elCairo BABY!

My belated bragging post. I'm chilling in elCairo, enjoying the weather, food, spending time with the family, meeting old and new friends. It's überkwel.

Pls expect the dismal blogging activity to continue till end of August.

The AntiApple Post

*Fesh pets his überPod.

Have you noticed how over the last few years Apple Fundamentalism has been on the rise? Former PCians are being converted en masse by fundamentalists who preach how their new Apple computer "changed their life". I came across one of the pamphlets those hard-line Applians use to recruit lost souls. The pamphlet highlights the five pillars of The Applian Doctrine:

1. God intended everything to be Apple, some lost their way.
2. Apple's OS has been coded by God. Line-by-line that is. So it's immaculate and error-free. It's blasphemous to claim otherwise.
3. God will smite any virus or worm if it attempts to infect an Apple machine.
4. You don't need to know why you want an Apple machine. You have to trust that it's the right thing for you. (a.k.a. the "La Tonakiesh Wala Togadel Ya Akh Ali" argument).
5. If you accept the Applian Doctrine, you need to convert 5 of your friends or God will turn you into a mouse. A two-button PC mouse, not one of those sexy Apple ones. Your choice.

So, even if you're a follower of The Enlightened One and hate The Great Satan, you have to admit that this is überkool.

My 200th Post!

It's awards season once more! As it is customary I will be awarding my last 100 post fakey awards. You can see last year's awards here. Here goes:

Most Visually Disturbing Post co-awarded to: Bounce Fesh, Bounce & Pickled Eggs, Anyone?
Most Worrying Post awarded to: Salam, Brother & My Evil uberPod
Most Condescending Post co-awarded to: The Mars Hoax & The Stupidity of the Masses
Most Inappropriate Post awarded to: Can't Help It
Most Useful Post awarded to: Let the Anal Probing Begin!
Best Psychotic Series awarded to: Black Fesh 1.0, 2.0, 3.0, 4.0, 5.0. 6.0 & 7.0
Most Polska-specific Post awarded to: The Sand Nigger
Geekiest Post awarded to: Lord of the Fesh
Best Dilbert-style Post awarded to: Consider THIS!
Most Fesh-specific Post awarded to: The Touchy-Feely Bill
Most Potential to End Life on Earth awarded to: Wait For It..
Most Ingenious Concept awarded to: *EFPoC(tm) Moments

This year's Most Popular post, by number of comments, is awarded to: Blog Bitch! Blog!

Thank you and pls stay tuned for 2009's awards to be announced August 2009.

Grow Up, Will You?

The best thing I like about the personal status (say on Google Talk or Facebook) is that you get the most unexpected comments. One time I had in my status that I was driving on the autobahn and an old friend, who I didn't talk with for months, got in touch and he told me a couple of interesting stories about when he was in Germany. That's why I always try to have my personal status as 'stand-alone' as possible, so that people can read it, understand it and if they choose act on it. Of course we've all occasionally felt a tat philosophical and had our status message as an old Chinese proverb, it's okay.

What I don't understand though are people on my list who consistently have those very abstract comments in their personal messages like "Oh, yes I will." Sure, it's their personal status, so they can knock themselves out, but really, what's the intent? I could think of three:
1. To send a specific someone a message, because some of those messages seem very personal in nature but they are abstract enough for the rest of us not to understand. If people are twisted enough to do this (instead of, say, talk to the person?) then they are sick, seriously.
2. To have people contact them wanting to understand their personal message. This is sad. Luring people to have some interest in your pathetic, pathetic life? Really?
3. To entertain themselves. Hmmm.. need I say more?

I think I should drop those folks off my list. No wait, maybe I should first set my personal message to "I'm removing YOU from my list" and then drop them? Afterwards, I'd change my message to "Ironic, isn't it?" so that I can have my other friends ask me about it and then I get to tell that story to them before they drop me off their lists.

Note: Zeez, if you still read my blog, this post is inspired by your recent personal status! :)

The USofE - Take II

Oh I gloated when I read this article about Sarkozy saying that the Irish will have to vote again after they shot-down the Lisbon treaty back in June. Why? Because back in July I wrote this post.

Principally Sarkozy had no right to mandate that the Irish vote again, but I can't help but understand his position. Most of the reasons the no-campaign in Ireland used to reject the Lisbon Treaty were not actually valid concerns, but that's not the issue. The issue is that a big part of the no-voters actually voted this way for issues not related to the Lisbon Treaty. The fishermen wanted better terms and the farmers wanted more subsidies. So in essence the no-voters manipulated the system for their own benefit. And in in doing so they derailed a very delicate EU-wide process.

If a government abuses its powers, just like what the Irish no-voters did, it would be quickly called a dictatorship and everyone would rally against it. But what happens if the citizens abuse their rights? Nothing, they will eventually be asked to vote again. Ironic isn't it?

Wait For It...

So CERN is getting ready to fire up its Doomsday Device in August. How do you think the thriving underground world of doomsday cults is preparing for this, obviously, very relevant event?

The Story Behind the News

Whenever I read a piece of news, I always wonder the story behind it. So today I read this:

Russia reduced its oil supplies to the Czech Republic by half for “technical reasons”. The cut came just after the Czechs agreed to host an American missile-defence radar. Strangely, the technical reasons did not affect oil supplies to any of the Czechs’ neighbours.

Which, you have to admit, is really kool. In my opinion, it takes more balls to pull something like that off than to openly threaten another country. Open threats have lost their appeal. Iran is threatening the US and Israel and the West is threatening Zimbabwe and realistically nothing is happening. So in my head here's how Russia's oil stunt actually happened:

*Mr. Medevedev is sitting on a large throne in the middle of a huge hall in the Kremlin draped in a black cloak. He is at the rightmost tip of the scene. A Kremlin trooper enters the scene running from the left and the camera zooms in to always keep both him and Mr. Medevedev at both ends of the scene. The trooper stops a few meters from the throne and gets down on one knee, Mr. Medevedev does not move.

Kremlin Trooper: Ma'Lord, I have news from from the Czech rebel base.
Emperor Medevedev: Speak..
Kremlin Trooper: The Czech rebels have agreed to host a part of the American missile defense shield.
Emperor Medvedev: Putin, what do you plan to do about this?
*Putin, who was standing in the shadow behind Emperor Medvedev's throne, enters the scene as the Kremlin Trooper leaves. Putin is wearing a distinctive head gear.
Darth Putin: I'll take care of it. Maybe a "problem" would hit the Czech's supply lines.
Emperor Medevedev: Gooooood, Gooooooood

The Shameful Post

So Munqy tagged me and I must admit the main thought running thru my mind while reading his list was that mine is going to be shorter.... ugh..... it's gym class all over again...*ahm*. So here's the deal, on those categories where my knowledge of the field is equivalent to my proficiency in the accursed Frozen Wastelandeese tongue I've left them empty because really I have no clue. On the other categories I picked the most recent work that caught my attention, so call it my 'current favorite'.

• Favorite Author: Khalid Hosseini
  
• Favorite Book: The Kite Runner
  
• Favorite Artist: ---
• Favorite Artwork: ---
  
• Favorite Poet:--- (gay?)
  
• Favorite Poem: ---(gay-er?)
  
• Favorite Singer: ---(I love you Michael! AWO!*ahm* shut up)
  
• Favorite Song: Bon Jovi's Welcome to Wherever You Are.
  
• Favorite Actor: Homer Simpson / Stewie Griffin (screw you, they count as actors)
  
• Favorite Director: ---
  
• Favorite Film: Lord of War

Happy Feshday: 27

The world celebrates today the Feshday. I have a very good feeling about this Feshday, I feel turning 27 is going to usher in a new Fesh! Oh and interestingly I did some research and seems the Feshday is celebrated elsewhere in the world! For example in Tanzania, Ukraine and Japan!

Islamophobia

A few months ago I started working with our inhouse Catbert (all hail the evil director of human resources) on instituting a policy for foreigners working in the Frozen Wastelands to be able to go back to their home country and work from there for a temporary period. My rational was simple. Foreigners go back home see friends and family. So after the initial week off you start getting bored since all your friends are eitherway at work, hence my reco for having this policy.

Though I tried to be as logical as possible, still Catbert shot down most of the material and data I shared. Having exhausted all possible channels I decided to unleash the most potent of my weapons: Islamophobia. You see, we have one Muslim dude here who has been very vocal about having this policy since he wants to spend Ramadan in Egypt, which is a fair request.

So, we get into a meeting and this dude presents his case and I quote: "I can't spend Ramadan here, since Ramadan now is coming in Summer, which means I will have to fast from 2am till 10pm, which I can't do". Catbert politely asked a few follow-up questions to understand why so and then she understood that the fasting is linked to sunrise and sunset. And then Catbert's tone totally changed and she seemed to have developed an understanding for the need for this policy.

I was surprised how Catbert, a Frozen Wastelander, didn't object to the dude's claim that sunrise in the Wastelands is at 2am and sunset is at 10pm? Yes, the Wastelands is a northern country but 4 hours of darkness (in September?!) is more of North Pole territory! And just to be sure I did some surfing and here are the actual numbers:

1. For Cairo, and during September, the length of day starts at 12h 45mins and goes down to 11h 53 mins. Full listing here.
2. For the Wastelands, also during September, the length of day starts at 13h 35mins (only 50 mins more than Cairo) and drops to *drum roll* 11h 39m... yess ladies and gents..14 full mins shorter than the fasting time in Cairo! Full listing here.

Oh Islamophobia .... what can't you do?

The Age of Information

Remember the good old days when all the statistics you got about a football match came after the match ended in the form of a simple table that listed four or five measures like: goals, cards, fouls, shots on goal? ah... I yearn for such days. Over the last few World Cups, I learned to accept that the statistics became more intrusive, often creeping into the screen in the middle of a good play, just to distract you. I also learned to accept how stalkerishly individual the stats became. Every now and then they'd show you how many shots a certain player did or fouls, it's cool.

Watching the Euro 2008 nowadays, I feel the organizers decided to take it to the 'Oh-yeah-we-can-calculate-THAT' level. Whenever a player is being substituted they'd show, along with the normal stats, those two annoying ones:
1. Passes Complete: 95 (79%). Why? Eitherway we don't see this stat for all the other players? And not to mention it doesn't tell us anything. He could have a low passing accuracy but passed a few brilliant passes that got the team their goals. And how are they calculating this? Is it automated or do they have a poor soul watching each player and counting (using an abacus) all passes and which of them is successfully completed and which is not?
2. Distance: 8.91km. Okay, for their own sakes, I hope that they have a GPS bug on all players that is reporting that because if they are calculating that any other way then they are truly showing off.

And if they have the technology (or the cheap abacus-using labour) why don't they put it to work on on some of those ideas:
For defenders:
- Untruthfully raising hand to claim last attack was offside (as %)
- Untruthfully claiming it's a goal kick not a corner kick (as %)
Midfield/Attack:
- Pretending it was a foul (as a %)
- Taking a dive for a penalty (as a %)

See the kool thing about those stats is that gradually they'll start to taint players who keep lying on the field. Not to mention, as more and more of those stats will be needed, I'll get into the abacus business and make billions of dongs! I'll then build a 3am dahab vault and swim in a sea of dongs....ah...that's the dream. And no, it's not gay. Not at all.

Give Us Their Heads! Or Their Balls!

As it is customary, the Frozen Wastelands landed in the same group as Germany, just like in the world cup. The couple have an itchy relationship not only on the pitch but off it too. Like last year's comments by the, often comedic, Wastelands president at an EU meeting about how his country would have more voting power if it weren't for Nazi Germany... errr... I bet the room fell silent after what he said, well technically after what the translator said. So in honor of what this newspaper calls 'bitter nationalism' and ahead today's opening game for both teams, a Wastelandees tabloid published a disgusting article that pictured the Wastelandees coach carrying the decapitated heads(!) of Germany's captain and coach?! Under the picture it read: Give Us Their Heads! Well, I can understand the wastelandees frustration seeing that they never won any game against Germany. But decapitated heads, with blood dripping and all, is maybe, just maybe, taking it too far.

So, as it is also customary, the Wastelanders had their asses handed over to them by Ballack et al. But the real fun moments of the match were those:
1. A wastelander defender stepping on Germany's striker's balls (yeap with the football shoes that have the pointy-metal things at the bottom ..OUCH) and objecting to the referee's free kick?! Dude, you probably popped one of his jewels, the least you could do is let him limp his way to a free kick in peace?!
2. This "Polish" player coming into the field in second half-time...err.. initially I was like, wait that's the Euro2008, right? Not Champions League? But turns out he's 100% "Polish"... amazing! : )

Over-dramatizations

I came across this video which was the highest rated video on digg.com for the last week, so I thought it's worth watching. I was wrong. Without ruining the video for you, it introduces this conspiracy to turn the internet to be run like cable (with packages of websites for a certain monthly fee) vs. the current set-up. I didn't do any research on the claims in the video, but even if they have some truth to them, I'm surprised how it's always easier, much easier, to blow any potential issue out of proportion than give it its right size. There's always something on the news about how Climate Change will wipe humans off the surface of the Earth or how back in the Cold War, a minor glitch can bring on a nuclear holocaust...etc. The most annoying part of those over-dramatizations is way they undermine what we, humans, are capable of. It's true that we have drove ourselves into a few pitholes, but if you look at our history those were the exceptions. Personally, I choose to have faith in our capabilities.

One of my earliest posts was about how oil will never run out. It's impossible for me to believe that we will sit there and drain the last droplet of oil with a big straw. Just equally impossible for me to buy was that Y2K was going to destroy us or that the Internet, as we know it, will end in 2012. Why? Well, specifically when it comes to technology, the world has seen this before. The operating system monopoly Microsoft had in the early 90's? It just took one man to start the Linux/open source revolution that changed the game. How about when Yahoo/Hotmail started squeezing your email inboxes and trying to make you pay (maybe like cable?) for higher capacity? Along came Google and changed the game and now everyone offers free 5GB-10GB email accounts. Why should we assume that the millions (or is it billion(s)?) of people who connect to the internet daily will sit there and let some corporations, however big they are, tell them how to use the internet? I read somewhere that Google has been buying alot of unused fiber and constructing a network across the US. Can you imagine the amount money Google can make if they offer "free" access to this network, in case those other evil providers implement this doomsday scenario explained in the video? Everyone will switch to the Google's network (Gnet, if you wish) overnight. And if Google didn't do it, someone somewhere will and that person will be the richest man on Earth. It's that simple.

Yes, I choose to have faith in our collective ingenuity. And I loath those who think that without them, and their armature videos, however hawt the anchor's cleavage is, the world will end.

Let the Anal Probing Begin!

I'm sure you've heard about this. A hunter-gatherer tribe discovered that has had no contact with the outside world! Technically speaking the majority of the world was at this (and I'll use the wrong word here, for lack of a more expressive one) "evolutionary" stage before the rise of agriculture. We're talking pre-6th century BC! I'm sure anthropologists worldwide are organizing bitchin' parties now to celebrate this find, though the article says that NGOs are trying to keep those tribes uncontactable. I can understand that. Bringing them suddenly in contact with the world can threaten their way of life.

But how about if we ease them into a 'contact' with us? For example:
1. We get the best and brightest of Hollywood directors to stage a UFO landing near the tribe's camp. A silver spaceship lands at nigh and three humans descend from it claiming that they come in peace ....from the future!
2. We then experiment on how could two very different civilizations can communicate? Should we use pictures? exchange tools? music?
3. We analy probe some of them. I'm not sure why, but since aliens keep doing it to our abductees, then I'm sure it's the 'hip' thing to do now when it comes to making contact and all.
4. We offer to take their leader to our World Headquarters on the Moon. Then we release him (with his bow and arrow) in the middle of Manhattan. I'm sure that would be a killer reality show that one of the major networks would totally sponsor.
5. Finally, we destroy their camp with big laser guns! No, no... of course I'm kidding. We keep that for Iraq.

Amen!

I came across this quote by Neil Gaiman:

"It does help, to be a writer, to have the sort of crazed ego that doesn't allow for failure. The best reaction to a rejection slip is a sort of wild-eyed madness, an evil grin, and sitting yourself in front of the keyboard muttering 'Okay, you bastards. Try rejecting this!' and then writing something so unbelievably brilliant that all other writers will disembowel themselves with their pens upon reading it, because there's nothing left to write. Because the rejection slips will arrive. And, if the books are published, then you can pretty much guarantee that bad reviews will be as well. And you'll need to learn how to shrug and keep going. Or you stop, and get a real job."

This should be every writer's prayer. Writers want people to read what they have to say. They even want their writing to influence how people perceive the world around them. So it's no wonder that writers (and other creative professionals for that matter) take a lot of pride in what they do.

Personally, I must say this quote summarizes exactly how I feel after writing a good post or article. The overinflated ego, the feeling that this is the most brilliant piece of writing ever and even the evil grin! Hell, if I could afford a thunder/lightning machine, I'd install one at my place and turn it on right after posting/publishing anything and hiss:

Exxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxcellent.

The USofE

I've always been a fan of the EU and I continue to be impressed by the progress it has made in such a short period of time. So a few months back I started reading more about the EU and it's history. To be honest with you, I was looking for the catch. Nothing is perfect. So I came across the common things you hear in the news: expansion hiccups, domination by big nations (e.g. Germany) and no unified foreign policy (e.g. the Iraq war).

The EU constitutional treaty, a treaty that was supposed to place a common constitution in Europe and instead was rejected by French and Dutch national referendums, caught my attention. Something about it seemed fishy. Reading more about it, turns out it was pretty comprehensive, the Eurocrats wanted to go for 99.9% but that was too much so the voters rejected it. What happened next was an elaborate plan, the EU leaders signed the Lisbon treaty which is basically 80% of the constitutional treaty (calling for a permanent EU president among other things), but did it in a clever way that makes it ratifiable (if that's a word) by the national parliaments, except in Ireland, so that they don't risk another No.

Here's a story from Egypt: our constitution didn't have popular vote for the office of president. The way it worked was for the national parliament to nominate and vote for president. If the nominee didn't get a certain majority, I believe they had to repeat the procedure and if it's still the same issue then they go to popular vote. Growing-up I always saw the president getting 99.9%. In 2005, this changed due to various internal and external forces and the presidential vote became a popular one. The president won by 88%, after he had to run a campaign and explain his 6-year plan and run commercials in the TV. Something which didn't happen before.

See, it would be wrong of me to compare the EU to Egypt, clearly Egypt has a lot to learn from the EU. But it's a disturbing thought that wherever you live, even if in some of the most democratic countries in the world, all votes can be equal but some will always be more equal than others. Be it the Eurocrats or the ruling party's old guards.

Wastelandees Cultural Evening

So yeah, a friend took me to a Wastelandees Cultural Evening and it was really interesting. I sat thru my first Polish movie, which was without subtitles, produced in the 70's and "funny". I know. That was like a goldmine, tiny blog postlets kept popping-up in my head every 10 seconds! But unfortunately we didn't watch the whole thing. Pity. Oh and I listened live to the Wastelands' equivalent of Led Zeppelin! They had some nice music going on, I must say. The weather wasn't that great, but overall was very interesting experience!

By the way, did you notice how virtually all 70's movies, doesn't matter where they were produced, look exactly the same? Men in pale-colored suites and those thick-rimmed eyeglasses, women with those pointy eyeglasses and the same white/black/blue Chevys? This Wastelandees movie I watched looked exactly like any Egyptian or American 70's movie I've seen. Weird, han? I don't think it's the same for say 90's movies. I don't know why.

The Baker

Unlike cooking, which I knew I'd be horrible at, I somehow knew that I'd be a good baker (maybe it's because I'm addicted to the scent of freshly baked bread?). So I always wanted to try and bake bread. But in a second thought, I decided that my first baking experience should be a cake and not bread. See, with cake you could always claim that this "charcoal aftertaste" is your signature in pastries, but with bread that would be hard to sell. So after several trips to the supermarket and a lot of online articles there was only one thing to do: call my mother. My mother is my cooking guru and I'm her slowest apprentice. She is always trying to give me tips on cooking that I always forget and I end up calling her when one of my failed cooking experiments go horribly wrong. So after calling her and getting some pointers, I was ready, let the baking begin!

I give you the one, the only, the uber gingerbread cake:


...oh and in case you were wondering, it tastes as good as it looks! YEAH! Hail me, for I am The Baker*.

*I highly recommend the movie by the way!

Obama's Appeal

I'm sure this was noted elsewhere before, but today I realised why Obama is so appealing as a presidential candidate. And no it's not his message of hope, charisma or the fact that he's a historic candidate. It's what he's not.

The current president was born to a wealthy family and a father who was himself a US president. Though a privileged child, I'm going to take a wild guess and say G.W.Bush was not a bright student. Just a hunch. Also as president he led the US into an extremely unpopular war and secured a historic low for himself when it comes to approval ratings as a US president. Enter Obama who was born into a simple family, with his father as a Kenyan immigrant. Though not as privileged as elpresidente currento, Obama turned out real good. A law degree from Yale, a place in the Senate and a couple of bestselling books he authored under his belt. As a politician he is against Bush's unpopular war in Iraq and he is for dialogue with nations that the current administration decided to pretend they don't exist, something that worked real well for G.W. when he was in 4th grade and couldn't get along with a gang of Syrian, Iranian and North Korean bullies.

So in short, Obama is simply the exact opposite of the buffoon who currently resides in 1600 Pennsylvania avenue!
*Fesh pauses for his dramatic revelation to sink in with the crowd... nothing.

Okay, okay, let's try a different approach, he's the one to bring balance to the Force?
*crowd bursts into cheers.

The Smalltalkers

I stopped smalltalking a long time ago. Just because we are waiting for the water to boil in a kitchenette does not justify someone asking me how my weekend was, at least for me. Of course, the smalltalkers would claim they are being nice and thoughtful and caring...bla bla bla. You know what I say? They lack self-confidence, the thought of standing there for 30 seconds with someone they don't know that much and NOT exchanging pleasantries is terrifying for them and they'll do anything to break that silence.

So, if your office swarms with the annoying smalltalkers here's the top 3 rude ways to get them to stop or at least to annoy them a bit:
1. Develop a short, cold reply for the typical smalltalk questions. Mine is: Good, Good.
2. Develop a gesture that is equivalent to 'Hi, how are you?', but since it's non-verbal it is not inviting for a conversation.
3. And that's the hardest one to do, never ask the same question back to the smalltalker. Smalltalkers, like parasites, are opportunists and if given the slightest chance for a conversation they'll jump on it and babel-on, until their coffee is ready and then they'll run of course.

Note: This post was inspired by Dipty's

Really?

I read this story today and I had some mixed feelings about it:

1. I was happy that environmental awareness is alive and well in Egypt.
2. I was sad that a chemical plant was 'discovered' after the construction already started? I am sure in Egypt's bureaucracy that there's a billion and one documents to be signed, didn't anyone discover that this plant can't be built that close to the city?
3. I was also sad of this selective environmental awareness, 90% of the cars in Damietta (I know, I was there once) leave behind them this black smoke cloud becuase their exhaust system was last checked in 1968. Why is it so easy to come out and protest others with a 'noble' message such as protecting the environment and not care about your car's impact?
4. I was deeply disturbed that for any issue to be resolved, the head of the Egyptian Parliament (and I assume the President too) need to get involved?! Isn't there a hierarchy of 13 trillion bureaucrats under the head of the Egyptian Parliament who could defuse such issue? Has the government turned into a crying baby who has to run to mummy whenever there's an issue?
   
5. I couldn't help my skepticism. Really? so Egyptians left the fact that Egypt's cities are one of the most polluted, the sectarian violence that is tearing us apart, the messed up economy, the skyrocketing unemployment, the "democratic kingdom" we have, the fact that ordinary people can't afford bread anymore and decided to marched against a petrochemical factory that's being built by a Canadian industry leader?

I'm not saying they shouldn't have come out to protest that factory, they should, they stood up for what they believe for and that's great. I'm just skeptic that the first protest I hear about from Damietta is about that and not the ever-increasing list of horrible things Egypt is facing.

Pickled Eggs, Anyone?

I haven't tasted pickled eggs yet, but I have a very strong feeling that the first time I do they'll taste horribly bad. When I say horribly bad I mean two orders of magnitude more horrible than eating a piece of your own liver. Which has been rotting in the sun for 12 hours. And a dog peed on it 4 hours ago.

So today as I was having my breakfast, that surprisingly didn't even include eggs in any shape or form, I wondered how would be the experience of eating my first pickled egg? Is it possible it could be as horrible as I think? And if it was, will I be happy with my newly acquired skill of predicting the taste of a food? Or would I be traumatised by the thought that a rotten piece of my liver that has been peed on would have probably tasted much better than what I just ate? What if I actually liked it? How would I be able to look myself in the eye everyday and tell myself that I can't possibly eat a rotten piece of my liver? I misjudged pickled eggs, didn't I?

Evolutionary Fesh

"Evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts do not go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's, but apples did not suspend themselves in mid-air, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape-like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered"

I'm a fanatic evolutionist, I believe life, intelligent or not, exists elsewhere in the universe. So it's no surprise that I usually get into hot debates with people, educated people, about evolution and sadly they almost always voice pathetic objections to the theory of evolution, here are the top two:

1. Evolution is at odds with religion.
I respect people choosing to believe that the world was created as explained in the Holy Books: in 7 days with humans created directly by God. What I don't respect is people claiming that the theory of evolution is wrong because it claims that we evolved without having God in the picture. Evolution is just the tip of our understanding of how we got here. Our current scientific understanding begins with a single moment, the moment of the Big Bang. There's no time before it and there is no explanation of how this moment came to be, sounds familiar? Yes, that's the creation moment according to science. Science and Religion do not disagree on whether there was a creation moment or not, they simply differ on when it was! Agree with whichever version you like, but don't dismiss science as Godless.

2. If it is true, why are we not evolving anymore?
The short answer is that we are evolving, just slowly. You need to factor in that based on fossil evidence humans started evolving from chimpanzees around 5-8 million years ago. Mind you that currently the difference in DNA sequence between a chimpanzee and a human is ONLY 5%. Think about that, it took 5 million years for 5% change in DNA. So of course you can't spot OUR evolution because our total documented history is little less than 10,000 years. But to answer your question in insects like the fruit fly, where the average generation lifetime is a lot shorter, evolution has been spotted in various lab experiments. Google it.

The Return of Das Iron Fesh!

Yessss....
I've been off my weight training for a while now mainly because of back trouble. But I'm back baby! Last Friday I marched into the gym with my work-out playlist ready on my uberPod and all!

Of course I spent yesterday, sore like hell, in bed. But I'm off to the gym again now... woho! Oh and I revisited my new year's resolutions and I'm doing quite well on 4 out of the 7. Another woho!

An Old Friend

Today I caught up with an old friend. I always enjoy talking with him, he is everything that I am not, yet on some level we are similar. We talked about a lot of things, I updated him with my news and he did the same. I hogged the conversation more and subconsciously tried to impress a person I admire and look up to. When we were almost done he shared with me one piece of advise, he said: Remember you can revisit your choices as you want, but never regret them.

It's amazing how an old friend not only can see right through you but also can give you the advise you need the most. I needed this advice badly and he knew that. I'm the kind of person who regularly revisits his choices and always obsesses about 'what if?'. I try to quantify costs of my wrong choices believing that by doing so I am learning from my mistakes. While in fact I am regretting something that I can not change, something that I should learn from rather than regret. It's amazing how stating the obvious can make you stop. And think.

Thanks old friend.

Game Sa3ayda

I used to play Estimation alot back during school and university days. It's a card game for four players and the objective is that each player estimates exactly how many hands they'll get depending on their cards. The interesting thing is that you lose if you get more or less hands, the only way to win is that you get exactly the number of hands you asked for. And since there are 13 hands in total, the sum of the hands that the four players will estimate can't be 13. This rule is there to ensure that at least one out of the four players will lose. Every couple of weeks or so we'd get a game that we called 'Game Sa3ayda' (loosely translated: Fool's Game). This game meant that all four players lost, so some ended up with more hands they asked for and some got less.

I'm no expert on global economy but couldn't help but notice the resemblance. Consumers are screwed, companies are screwed, big banks are screwed, governments are screwed, the American economy is screwed and the European and Asian stock markets are in the red? Is there anyone gaining anything from this? I can understand that one country would have a recession and its currency and economy will plummet. But how could we have designed such an elaborate global economic model that simply allows everyone to lose? That's one hell of a Game Sa3ayda.

Leave It Alone...

I'm appalled by all the assaults on the Olympic torch during its relay in the name of human rights in China and/or Tibet. Though the Olympic games is an international apolitical forum, it was used in the past to make political statement in much more appropriate ways. Athletes and governments have historically boycotted games and of course there is the infamous Black Power salute of the '68 games that continues to be a moving memorial to the civil rights movement.

So why violently attack the torch bearers and try to extinguish the torch? Isn't it ironic that those violent acts are committed in the name of Tibet, a notoriously peaceful nation? With the world as messed up as it is today, do we really need to sabotage one of the few last reasons to celebrate humanity?

The Challenge of Communication

I'm not one of them anal folks who constipate when they read a grammatically incorrect sentence or a misspelled word..

*Mean look at Munqy.

That's because I suck at both spelling and grammar and more importantly I value 'the big picture'. I don't mind a misspelled word here or there if I can clearly understand the writer's intentions. The language, to me, is only a means of conveying the more valuable concepts and opinions. I do cringe though when people just pee all over 'the big picture' and here's a good example, the English is a bit Frozen Wastelandees but bare with me:

[...] is the company caring about the environment every day. Every day for our sheet of papers dies many trees. Due to this fact we would like to recommend you how to economize this losses in better solution of printing your documents. Step 1: First, before printing think about the trees, Step 2: [...] Step 3: [...] Step 4: If it is possible use douplex printing. Additionally, less printed papers- lower costs and less paper on your desks and in your bag.

The 'big picture' here is that now we have double-sided (duplex) printing at the office and we should use it. But the message does everything to lose the reader on an idea that practically sells itself, for example:

• Starting with the guilt trip about how for our paper many trees die is too cliche. Those who care are already not wasting paper and those who don't won't read this line and have an epiphany, quite their jobs and join Greenpeace.
  
• Moving from a pointless rambling introduction to bullet-point is great. Having the first bullet being 'think about the trees before you print' is...err.. Goto 10?
  
• Keeping your main point (duplex printing) to the last point doesn't make sense. Everyone is busy (or acts like it) so hiding your main point wouldn't help.
  
• Finally, keeping probably the biggest advantage of duplex printing (less paper on your desk and in your bag) as the last line in your 1-page message... hmm... Goto 30?
  

Communications, especially in The Corporate Dens of Evil, should cut to the chase. This message could have the same effect if not better if it were sent like this:

All, now we have duplex printing (i.e. double-sided printing). It's fast, it's simple and it does not waste paper. That means less mess on your desk, less weight in your bag and less damage to the environment. Please use it.

The Band's Visit

I watched 'The Band's Visit' yesterday and was extremely impressed. The anti-Israeli propaganda is alive and well in Egypt with Israelis, who have to be named David or Cohen, always portrayed as evil. And although I haven't watched Israeli movies, I assumed it would also be littered with anti-Arab messages.

The Band's Visit, an Israeli movie about an Egyptian musical band that travels to Israel, was a pleasant surprise to me as didn't go down the path of the cliche mutual hatred or the cheesy political symbolism like most movies, of the same kind, usually do. On the other hand, the movie is a take on what's common between a typical person from Egypt and another from Israel. I remember reading about a speech by a US president, probably Reagan, during the Cold War where he talked about how if a US citizen and a Soviet one met, they'd find a lot more in common between them. Watching this movie gave me the same feeling. It's a pity that very few people in Egypt, and the Arab world, would see it thought. As you might have guessed it's not showing anywhere I know of in the Arab world.

I just hate it when a much-needed step, however small it may be, towards mutual understanding is ignored like that.

P.S: Kudos to Dipty for recommending

Random Fesh

I've been tagged by Munqy and Nora to do this 10 random things you might not know about me. Here goes:

1. I don't appreciate hand-shaking for the sake of hand-shaking. If we are friends and I saw you yesterday, I wouldn't want to shake your hand when I meet you today. The concept of hand-shaking should be restricted to formal introductions. Oh and to top it off, I'm highly untouchy-unfeely.

2. I have the weirdest turn-on: dark pants that have thin white stripes. They drive me crazy regardless of whether the chickita wearing them is hot or not.

3. You know those drying machines in public toilets that have a roll of cloth and you're supposed to pull them, dry your hand and then leave them to be automatically rolled back in? I'm positive there is something sinister about them, don't know what it is, but I assure you I'm onto them.

4. I have an evil uberPod that regularly taunts me by its sarcastic music choice.

5. I FIFO everything in my kitchen: water bottles, fruits, yogurt...etc anything has to be consumed in the order it was purchased.

6. I have a tendency to 'fight the system' when I'm treated unfairly. I do that even if I don't have the slightest chance to win, it's not wining that matters to me, it's causing the most harm as I go down that does. Some say I'm stubborn others say I'm plain stupid. I like to think I'm a pain in the ass if treated unfairly.

7. I worship the number 7 and 2007 was MY YEAR.

8. I once peed on someone, and no she wasn't bitten by a jelly fish.

9. I consider Mojito a gay drink.

10. I have watched every episode of Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama and South Park at least twice.

Next I tag Dipty and Eureka.