Monday, November 05, 2007

Lord of the Fesh

Legend has it that ships brought the Elves from the West to Middle-fesh. Munqy, an Elven Lord, befriended Fesh Bombadil and introduced him to the saga of Lord of the Rings. Fesh was initially skeptical and repeatedly mocked Munqy for his nerdy taste. Months later the cold winter nights of the Frozen Wastelands forced Fesh to acquire the Lord of the Rings trilogy (in print format) and read it. Fesh's amazingly slow reading speed meant that he kept on reading the books till the following summer. As Fesh put down the last of the three books, he knew that his world will never be the same. Middle-fesh too will never be the same, it was then that the First Age of Middle-fesh ended.

In the Second Age of Middle-fesh, ShadShad, of the Dwarves shares Fesh's dream of holding a 12-hour-long Lord of the Rings movie marathon. On a Saturday morning, Fesh embarked on a perilous journey to cross Middle-fesh and arrived safely at the Northern Caves, where ShadShad dwelt. As Fesh entered the Northern Caves he was drawn to the DVD boxset of the Extended Edition of Lord of the Rings, Fesh held it up close and hissed: my preccccciiiioooouuuussssssss. The marathon started at noon and the by the stroke of midnight the marathon was over and with it ended the Second Age of Middle-fesh.

The Third Age of Middle-fesh started with Fesh's Journey to Mordor (a.k.a. London). Fesh first stopped at Rivendell (a.k.a. Manchester) where he met aku the Grey and there the Fellowship of the Fesh was formed. The Two Companions left Rivendell and set off for Mordor. They arrived on a cold Saturday noon where they met Lady Gogoladriel. Together Fesh Bombadil, aku the Grey and Lady Gogoladriel entered Mt. Doom and there they cast the One Ring into the fire. On that Saturday afternoon, after the curtains were closed the Third Age of Middle-fesh has passed and the dominion of The Fesh began.

[If you didn't understand anything from the above, here's the summary: I read the Lord of the Rings books in like 9 months, thanks to Munqy for recommending! I then watched all 3 DVDs (extended edition) on one day, pls spare me the nerd jokes. Thanks ShadShad for arranging that! Finally I watched the biggest theater production of Lord of the Rings in London, which was awesome. Thanks aku and Gogo!]

41 comments:

Nora said...

:o(

I hate Lord of the Rings..

Never could really get into it.

Fesh said...

*Fesh cocks his shotgun..
I'll give you a 10-second headstart..

10

3

1

*chuck-chuck* *BAM*
*chuck-chuck* *BAM*

Nora said...

Hahahahahahahha!!!!

Nice...

I see you take Lord of the Rings very seriously...

Do you like Harry Potter too?

Fesh said...

Nah, I like Lord of the Rings not only becuase it's a fantasy, it's all those intricate details, histories, races...etc. Haven't read Harry Potter and not that excited to do so.... for me it's a kids fantasy... and according to me it's one of the orginal 7 sins to put Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter in the same league.

Nora said...

Hmm, I think that is exactly why I hate Lord of the Rings!

Hmm, Harry Potter is not a kids fantasy!!
It is for everyone!!!

I agree that Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings should never be in the same league.. Harry Potter would kick everyone in Lord of the Rings asses!!!!!

:o)

Munqy said...

*sniff* *sniff* my little Fesh is all growed up.

Nora: :o Thou comparest Tolkien to the knave known as Rowling???? Oh this is serious. REALLY serious.

Honestly though, I don't mind Potter, at least from book four onwards. The first three really are childish, but it does get much darker. However, Rowling will never be able to compete with Tokien in terms of world building, Middle Earth is richer and more in depth than anything ever written (IMO), except for maybe the Dune series of books.

And did my nerd just creep out again?

Nora said...

Well, I never got through a Lord of the Rings book nor movie.. so I really cannot comment.
Well, I cannot make an educated comment at least...
But I can say that Harry Potter books and movies always kept me interested. I never fell asleep out of boredom with Harry Potter..
Tokien however managed to get me to sleep faster than any sleeping pill!!
So, Tokien is boring... Rowling kicks ass!!!!

And don't worry about the nerd creeping out.. he is an interesting nerd so it is not that bad...

Anonymous said...

OMG I love LOFTR! I have serious regrets for not reading the books before watching the movies. :( I watched the movies at least 3 times. I have a tiny inner nerd too. And I'm in love with the Elves... each and every one of them.

And when I started reading your post I got super excited!! You do a good fake LOFTR...

Ahhhh good stuff!

Anonymous said...

I got so excited thinking about the movies that I forgot to ask you how the play was?? I can't picture at all what it would be like...

Jade said...

Jade fleds the seen. Thinking...

"Oh my God, Like - I cant be seen here - who are all these nerds"

Already gone - cant read the reply.

Fesh said...

*Fesh bows to Munqy
Will I ever be able to pay you back? You have shown me the light.....DUDE I'll be like your bitch when I come to elCairo... yes ...yes ...sexual favors included.

NileGirl, LOTR FOR THE WIN! and Oh My God ... the play was amazing?! the stage was divided to like 15 small pieces and they were all put on hydrolic lifts so all thru the play they were like building "mountains" as the actors walked around the stage?! And the effect?! WOW! There is this scene where Frodo disappears when he puts the Ring on @ the Bree...and MAN he actually disappears?! I don't know how they do it! It's a MUST Watch if you're an uber fan and happen to be in London!

psssssssssst Jade, stick around, this way you'll be the kool one!

Anonymous said...

OOohhh it sounds so cool. I would love to see that. Only in london though eh? That sucks. the closest i'm getting to london is the two and a half minute layover on my way to egypt.

afoda said...

damn mannn, I can't compete with any of the comments on that post...

however, can I be aku the blue? or do we have to stick with the story line? and ya, how about we sticking fish n' chips somehow in the story. weren't they eating something weird keda all the time?

apart from that, ya I totally agree with nora and munqy, LOTR and HP sucks!

can you make a more interesting post, maybe on aaa ... samurai jack or family guy?

afoda said...

damn mannn, I can't compete with any of the comments on that post...

however, can I be aku the blue? or do we have to stick with the story line? and ya, how about we sticking fish n' chips somehow in the story. weren't they eating something weird keda all the time?

apart from that, ya I totally agree with nora and munqy, LOTR and HP sucks!

can you make a more interesting post, maybe on aaa ... samurai jack or family guy?

Fesh said...

No way dude, you got like the best charecter of them all! Oh yeah, the Fish 'n chips can be our version of the lembas!

HEY! LOTR DOES NOT SUCK! IT RULES!

Yes sir, 1 family guy-related post coming up. Would you like Freedom Fries with that?

Munqy said...

Double posting nubletoid, you dare insult both JRRT and Rowling?

P.S. Aku the Grey, Gandalf the Grey, so you already HAVE a cool name.

Fesh said...

*Fesh joins Munqy in mocking aku's n00bish double posting.

afoda said...

the double posting is for dramatic effect u idiotic oxymoron.

(actually I discovered this follow-up comments with mail after I posted the first time, so I had to post again to know what you're talking about you nerds)

aku the blue is by far way much cooler than aku the gray which already way much cooler than gandalf the gray and gandalf the white.

and yes, I'll take some of those whatever you call them fries with my family guy please.

and I still retain the right to say both LOTR and HP sucks. being a person who read only 10 books in his entire life! imagine if they were the 7 HP and the 3 LOTR, wouldn't that JUST SUCK!

Fesh said...

*Fesh clearly convinced with aku's solid arugment says:
Well sir, we don't have any blue here, but I can check at the back... for sure we have yellow though, are you a Large?

And dude, you can't handle LOTRs... I could see you getting bored like hell at the play... fa for sure you're not worthy of reading LOTRs ...becuase it's much, MUCH more brong than the play :D

Nora said...

Can I have a Family Guy post too.. but hold the fries?

Oh yeah, LOTR still sucks... and you're a nerd for going to the play!

Hey, are there any gay characters in LOTR?

Munqy said...

*Munqy starts getting seizures.

Tolkien had always intended LOTR to be 1 book, not 3, and certainly not the six sections that it is sold as now.

As for gay characters, well Tolkien was a British prude. The closest you ever get to anything resembling sex in any of his books is when people sing to each other in Elven. Also, I firmly believe that ALL elves are gay - take a look at Orlando Bloom in LOTR to see what I mean.

Forsoothsayer said...

is it sad that reading ur blog makes me like u more?

Forsoothsayer said...

and in other news, are u aware that the lord of the rings, much like the narnia series, was supposed to teach people about christianity?

Fesh said...

Nora, Munqy, I always belived the Hobbits were mostly gay... but Tolkien had to ruin my theory by having Sam get married... maybe they are bi-curious?

Forsooth, it's VERY sad, especially when you say this to such a nerdy post. This one of those times when you are supposed NOT to listen to the voice in your head. No way?! LOTR and Christianity! Wow! tell more!

Nora said...

I never knew that LOTR was teaching Christianity too..

It is very obvious in the Narnia series.. maybe I just never got through enough of LOTR to notice..

That's pretty cool...!

Fesh said...

This is actually very weird, no mention of the LOTR's Christianty link at all on wikipedia?! OMG Wikipedia has failed me... after all of those years... where would I go now if I need to learn somethign new...

Nora said...

If it is not in Wikipedia then do not believe it!!!!!

Wikipedia never fails...

Fesh said...

...but...maybe the truth is out there?

(assuming off course wikpiedia is "in here").

Anonymous said...

Psshhh munqy! Please don't mess with my elves. I love the elves and they were not gay and Orlando bloom was absolutely NOT gay as an elf. That movie is the reason Orlando fell in love with me (in my head) aslan so how could he be gay? You're gay.

Fesh said...

*Fesh is tempted to share the incriminating info he has about Munqy's apparent homosexuality.

MUST...CONTROL....SELF.....

afoda said...

aku, on the other hand, has no problem sharing the incriminating info he has about Munqy's and fesh fehs' apparent homosexuality. Of course, for a price!$!

Nora said...

Nora is determined to not break the trust between her and Fesh..
She will not tell a soul about when he told her about his homsexuality...

Oops!!

I was never good at keeping secrets....

Fesh said...

*Fesh slips aku a 1 billion zloty bill.

I trust I will be brushed out of all the pictures, right?

Fesh said...

D'oH! I am never trusting you with any more secrets! First you let the word out about my cattle-fetish and now this...YOU ARE OUT OF THE CIRCLE!

Munqy said...

Wow, from LOTR to cattle fetish in under 40 posts. Incredible.

Forsooth: yeah, I was aware. JRRT and CSL were both fairly religious, but Tolkien hid his references more subtly than Lewis. It becomes much more obvious in stories of Middle Earth outside of LOTR, like The Silmarillion.

Fesh said...

See my friend, I told you the Blogosphere was ready of some good old fashion Gmail rambling...and you doubted me.

Nora said...

NO!!!!!!!

Don't kick me out of the circle!!!

I promise I will be worthy!!!

:o)

Fesh said...

Hmmmm.... the Force is storng in this one. Mind you that getting back into The Circle is not any easy feat. Master Masons have failed this test repeatedly. It's a test of courage, nerdyness, wisdom, pervyness and most importantly....Feshyness.

I'd say you don't have a chance.

Nora said...

Do not underestimate me my friend...

:o)

Fesh said...

hehehehehehe... actually... I think not having a chance to pass this test is actually a good thing. I mean who wants to pass a test that is based on how good of a nerd and perv you are? ...apart from me..BECAUSE I'D OWN ANYONE IN SUCH A TEST... except for Munqy.

*Fesh bows to Grand Master Munqy.

Nora said...

Sadly, I think I might fare too poorly on that test. I am ashamed to admit it...

I try to hide both, but I think I am a closet nerdy perv!

I am sure I would be nothing near the 2 of you great masters... but I do not think I am the scum of the group either...