Monday, June 09, 2008

Give Us Their Heads! Or Their Balls!

As it is customary, the Frozen Wastelands landed in the same group as Germany, just like in the world cup. The couple have an itchy relationship not only on the pitch but off it too. Like last year's comments by the, often comedic, Wastelands president at an EU meeting about how his country would have more voting power if it weren't for Nazi Germany... errr... I bet the room fell silent after what he said, well technically after what the translator said. So in honor of what this newspaper calls 'bitter nationalism' and ahead today's opening game for both teams, a Wastelandees tabloid published a disgusting article that pictured the Wastelandees coach carrying the decapitated heads(!) of Germany's captain and coach?! Under the picture it read: Give Us Their Heads! Well, I can understand the wastelandees frustration seeing that they never won any game against Germany. But decapitated heads, with blood dripping and all, is maybe, just maybe, taking it too far.

So, as it is also customary, the Wastelanders had their asses handed over to them by Ballack et al. But the real fun moments of the match were those:
1. A wastelander defender stepping on Germany's striker's balls (yeap with the football shoes that have the pointy-metal things at the bottom ..OUCH) and objecting to the referee's free kick?! Dude, you probably popped one of his jewels, the least you could do is let him limp his way to a free kick in peace?!
2. This "Polish" player coming into the field in second half-time...err.. initially I was like, wait that's the Euro2008, right? Not Champions League? But turns out he's 100% "Polish"... amazing! : )

6 comments:

M said...

This "Polish Player" is not 100% Polish!!!!! And isn't it ironic that while Germany "Wasted" the Polish Behind, The Polish Kicked the Germans ass yet were some how United with them under the "Blue M' White" circle of BMW in Formula Una. Wonder how they felt inside!

Fesh said...

Dude, I said he's 100% "Polish", the quotes should signal irony? :)

I aint a big F1 fan, but if you're refereing to this then yeah congrats to the Wastelander dude, though it kinda takes a bit from the win when the Associated Press report is titled: "Kubica gets first F1 win after Hamilton's mistake" :))))

Munqy said...

FeshFesh baby, I think your workmates are about to get medieval on your ass and stick you in an Iron Maiden.You're about to see what strategically positioned spikes can do to your plums first hand methinks.

Munqy said...

And dude, that player's been 100% Polish for like, FOREVER. Well, since April 2008 anyway. It's good that he discovered he was Polish in time for the Euro.

Fesh said...

So let's assume Brazil's football coach now notices this "Polish" due and asks him to join the national Brazilian team... would he be able to? wouldn't that be like he slept with the Wastelandees national team and never called again?

Fesh said...

...err and I missed this bit with spikes and my plums.... uhm... how do you know that?! I never told anyone!