I haven't tasted pickled eggs yet, but I have a very strong feeling that the first time I do they'll taste horribly bad. When I say horribly bad I mean two orders of magnitude more horrible than eating a piece of your own liver. Which has been rotting in the sun for 12 hours. And a dog peed on it 4 hours ago.
So today as I was having my breakfast, that surprisingly didn't even include eggs in any shape or form, I wondered how would be the experience of eating my first pickled egg? Is it possible it could be as horrible as I think? And if it was, will I be happy with my newly acquired skill of predicting the taste of a food? Or would I be traumatised by the thought that a rotten piece of my liver that has been peed on would have probably tasted much better than what I just ate? What if I actually liked it? How would I be able to look myself in the eye everyday and tell myself that I can't possibly eat a rotten piece of my liver? I misjudged pickled eggs, didn't I?
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Evolutionary Fesh
"Evolution is a theory. It is also a fact. And facts and theories are different things, not rungs in a hierarchy of increasing certainty. Facts are the world's data. Theories are structures of ideas that explain and interpret facts. Facts do not go away when scientists debate rival theories to explain them. Einstein's theory of gravitation replaced Newton's, but apples did not suspend themselves in mid-air, pending the outcome. And humans evolved from ape-like ancestors whether they did so by Darwin's proposed mechanism or by some other yet to be discovered"
I'm a fanatic evolutionist, I believe life, intelligent or not, exists elsewhere in the universe. So it's no surprise that I usually get into hot debates with people, educated people, about evolution and sadly they almost always voice pathetic objections to the theory of evolution, here are the top two:
1. Evolution is at odds with religion.
I respect people choosing to believe that the world was created as explained in the Holy Books: in 7 days with humans created directly by God. What I don't respect is people claiming that the theory of evolution is wrong because it claims that we evolved without having God in the picture. Evolution is just the tip of our understanding of how we got here. Our current scientific understanding begins with a single moment, the moment of the Big Bang. There's no time before it and there is no explanation of how this moment came to be, sounds familiar? Yes, that's the creation moment according to science. Science and Religion do not disagree on whether there was a creation moment or not, they simply differ on when it was! Agree with whichever version you like, but don't dismiss science as Godless.
2. If it is true, why are we not evolving anymore?
The short answer is that we are evolving, just slowly. You need to factor in that based on fossil evidence humans started evolving from chimpanzees around 5-8 million years ago. Mind you that currently the difference in DNA sequence between a chimpanzee and a human is ONLY 5%. Think about that, it took 5 million years for 5% change in DNA. So of course you can't spot OUR evolution because our total documented history is little less than 10,000 years. But to answer your question in insects like the fruit fly, where the average generation lifetime is a lot shorter, evolution has been spotted in various lab experiments. Google it.
I'm a fanatic evolutionist, I believe life, intelligent or not, exists elsewhere in the universe. So it's no surprise that I usually get into hot debates with people, educated people, about evolution and sadly they almost always voice pathetic objections to the theory of evolution, here are the top two:
1. Evolution is at odds with religion.
I respect people choosing to believe that the world was created as explained in the Holy Books: in 7 days with humans created directly by God. What I don't respect is people claiming that the theory of evolution is wrong because it claims that we evolved without having God in the picture. Evolution is just the tip of our understanding of how we got here. Our current scientific understanding begins with a single moment, the moment of the Big Bang. There's no time before it and there is no explanation of how this moment came to be, sounds familiar? Yes, that's the creation moment according to science. Science and Religion do not disagree on whether there was a creation moment or not, they simply differ on when it was! Agree with whichever version you like, but don't dismiss science as Godless.
2. If it is true, why are we not evolving anymore?
The short answer is that we are evolving, just slowly. You need to factor in that based on fossil evidence humans started evolving from chimpanzees around 5-8 million years ago. Mind you that currently the difference in DNA sequence between a chimpanzee and a human is ONLY 5%. Think about that, it took 5 million years for 5% change in DNA. So of course you can't spot OUR evolution because our total documented history is little less than 10,000 years. But to answer your question in insects like the fruit fly, where the average generation lifetime is a lot shorter, evolution has been spotted in various lab experiments. Google it.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
The Return of Das Iron Fesh!
Yessss....
I've been off my weight training for a while now mainly because of back trouble. But I'm back baby! Last Friday I marched into the gym with my work-out playlist ready on my uberPod and all!
Of course I spent yesterday, sore like hell, in bed. But I'm off to the gym again now... woho! Oh and I revisited my new year's resolutions and I'm doing quite well on 4 out of the 7. Another woho!
I've been off my weight training for a while now mainly because of back trouble. But I'm back baby! Last Friday I marched into the gym with my work-out playlist ready on my uberPod and all!
Of course I spent yesterday, sore like hell, in bed. But I'm off to the gym again now... woho! Oh and I revisited my new year's resolutions and I'm doing quite well on 4 out of the 7. Another woho!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
An Old Friend
Today I caught up with an old friend. I always enjoy talking with him, he is everything that I am not, yet on some level we are similar. We talked about a lot of things, I updated him with my news and he did the same. I hogged the conversation more and subconsciously tried to impress a person I admire and look up to. When we were almost done he shared with me one piece of advise, he said: Remember you can revisit your choices as you want, but never regret them.
It's amazing how an old friend not only can see right through you but also can give you the advise you need the most. I needed this advice badly and he knew that. I'm the kind of person who regularly revisits his choices and always obsesses about 'what if?'. I try to quantify costs of my wrong choices believing that by doing so I am learning from my mistakes. While in fact I am regretting something that I can not change, something that I should learn from rather than regret. It's amazing how stating the obvious can make you stop. And think.
Thanks old friend.
It's amazing how an old friend not only can see right through you but also can give you the advise you need the most. I needed this advice badly and he knew that. I'm the kind of person who regularly revisits his choices and always obsesses about 'what if?'. I try to quantify costs of my wrong choices believing that by doing so I am learning from my mistakes. While in fact I am regretting something that I can not change, something that I should learn from rather than regret. It's amazing how stating the obvious can make you stop. And think.
Thanks old friend.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Game Sa3ayda
I used to play Estimation alot back during school and university days. It's a card game for four players and the objective is that each player estimates exactly how many hands they'll get depending on their cards. The interesting thing is that you lose if you get more or less hands, the only way to win is that you get exactly the number of hands you asked for. And since there are 13 hands in total, the sum of the hands that the four players will estimate can't be 13. This rule is there to ensure that at least one out of the four players will lose. Every couple of weeks or so we'd get a game that we called 'Game Sa3ayda' (loosely translated: Fool's Game). This game meant that all four players lost, so some ended up with more hands they asked for and some got less.
I'm no expert on global economy but couldn't help but notice the resemblance. Consumers are screwed, companies are screwed, big banks are screwed, governments are screwed, the American economy is screwed and the European and Asian stock markets are in the red? Is there anyone gaining anything from this? I can understand that one country would have a recession and its currency and economy will plummet. But how could we have designed such an elaborate global economic model that simply allows everyone to lose? That's one hell of a Game Sa3ayda.
I'm no expert on global economy but couldn't help but notice the resemblance. Consumers are screwed, companies are screwed, big banks are screwed, governments are screwed, the American economy is screwed and the European and Asian stock markets are in the red? Is there anyone gaining anything from this? I can understand that one country would have a recession and its currency and economy will plummet. But how could we have designed such an elaborate global economic model that simply allows everyone to lose? That's one hell of a Game Sa3ayda.
Monday, April 07, 2008
Leave It Alone...
I'm appalled by all the assaults on the Olympic torch during its relay in the name of human rights in China and/or Tibet. Though the Olympic games is an international apolitical forum, it was used in the past to make political statement in much more appropriate ways. Athletes and governments have historically boycotted games and of course there is the infamous Black Power salute of the '68 games that continues to be a moving memorial to the civil rights movement.
So why violently attack the torch bearers and try to extinguish the torch? Isn't it ironic that those violent acts are committed in the name of Tibet, a notoriously peaceful nation? With the world as messed up as it is today, do we really need to sabotage one of the few last reasons to celebrate humanity?
So why violently attack the torch bearers and try to extinguish the torch? Isn't it ironic that those violent acts are committed in the name of Tibet, a notoriously peaceful nation? With the world as messed up as it is today, do we really need to sabotage one of the few last reasons to celebrate humanity?
Sunday, April 06, 2008
The Challenge of Communication
I'm not one of them anal folks who constipate when they read a grammatically incorrect sentence or a misspelled word..
*Mean look at Munqy.
That's because I suck at both spelling and grammar and more importantly I value 'the big picture'. I don't mind a misspelled word here or there if I can clearly understand the writer's intentions. The language, to me, is only a means of conveying the more valuable concepts and opinions. I do cringe though when people just pee all over 'the big picture' and here's a good example, the English is a bit Frozen Wastelandees but bare with me:
[...] is the company caring about the environment every day. Every day for our sheet of papers dies many trees. Due to this fact we would like to recommend you how to economize this losses in better solution of printing your documents. Step 1: First, before printing think about the trees, Step 2: [...] Step 3: [...] Step 4: If it is possible use douplex printing. Additionally, less printed papers- lower costs and less paper on your desks and in your bag.
The 'big picture' here is that now we have double-sided (duplex) printing at the office and we should use it. But the message does everything to lose the reader on an idea that practically sells itself, for example:
All, now we have duplex printing (i.e. double-sided printing). It's fast, it's simple and it does not waste paper. That means less mess on your desk, less weight in your bag and less damage to the environment. Please use it.
*Mean look at Munqy.
That's because I suck at both spelling and grammar and more importantly I value 'the big picture'. I don't mind a misspelled word here or there if I can clearly understand the writer's intentions. The language, to me, is only a means of conveying the more valuable concepts and opinions. I do cringe though when people just pee all over 'the big picture' and here's a good example, the English is a bit Frozen Wastelandees but bare with me:
[...] is the company caring about the environment every day. Every day for our sheet of papers dies many trees. Due to this fact we would like to recommend you how to economize this losses in better solution of printing your documents. Step 1: First, before printing think about the trees, Step 2: [...] Step 3: [...] Step 4: If it is possible use douplex printing. Additionally, less printed papers- lower costs and less paper on your desks and in your bag.
The 'big picture' here is that now we have double-sided (duplex) printing at the office and we should use it. But the message does everything to lose the reader on an idea that practically sells itself, for example:
- Starting with the guilt trip about how for our paper many trees die is too cliche. Those who care are already not wasting paper and those who don't won't read this line and have an epiphany, quite their jobs and join Greenpeace.
- Moving from a pointless rambling introduction to bullet-point is great. Having the first bullet being 'think about the trees before you print' is...err.. Goto 10?
- Keeping your main point (duplex printing) to the last point doesn't make sense. Everyone is busy (or acts like it) so hiding your main point wouldn't help.
- Finally, keeping probably the biggest advantage of duplex printing (less paper on your desk and in your bag) as the last line in your 1-page message... hmm... Goto 30?
All, now we have duplex printing (i.e. double-sided printing). It's fast, it's simple and it does not waste paper. That means less mess on your desk, less weight in your bag and less damage to the environment. Please use it.
Friday, April 04, 2008
The Band's Visit
I watched 'The Band's Visit' yesterday and was extremely impressed. The anti-Israeli propaganda is alive and well in Egypt with Israelis, who have to be named David or Cohen, always portrayed as evil. And although I haven't watched Israeli movies, I assumed it would also be littered with anti-Arab messages.
The Band's Visit, an Israeli movie about an Egyptian musical band that travels to Israel, was a pleasant surprise to me as didn't go down the path of the cliche mutual hatred or the cheesy political symbolism like most movies, of the same kind, usually do. On the other hand, the movie is a take on what's common between a typical person from Egypt and another from Israel. I remember reading about a speech by a US president, probably Reagan, during the Cold War where he talked about how if a US citizen and a Soviet one met, they'd find a lot more in common between them. Watching this movie gave me the same feeling. It's a pity that very few people in Egypt, and the Arab world, would see it thought. As you might have guessed it's not showing anywhere I know of in the Arab world.
I just hate it when a much-needed step, however small it may be, towards mutual understanding is ignored like that.
P.S: Kudos to Dipty for recommending
The Band's Visit, an Israeli movie about an Egyptian musical band that travels to Israel, was a pleasant surprise to me as didn't go down the path of the cliche mutual hatred or the cheesy political symbolism like most movies, of the same kind, usually do. On the other hand, the movie is a take on what's common between a typical person from Egypt and another from Israel. I remember reading about a speech by a US president, probably Reagan, during the Cold War where he talked about how if a US citizen and a Soviet one met, they'd find a lot more in common between them. Watching this movie gave me the same feeling. It's a pity that very few people in Egypt, and the Arab world, would see it thought. As you might have guessed it's not showing anywhere I know of in the Arab world.
I just hate it when a much-needed step, however small it may be, towards mutual understanding is ignored like that.
P.S: Kudos to Dipty for recommending
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
Random Fesh
I've been tagged by Munqy and Nora to do this 10 random things you might not know about me. Here goes:
1. I don't appreciate hand-shaking for the sake of hand-shaking. If we are friends and I saw you yesterday, I wouldn't want to shake your hand when I meet you today. The concept of hand-shaking should be restricted to formal introductions. Oh and to top it off, I'm highly untouchy-unfeely.
2. I have the weirdest turn-on: dark pants that have thin white stripes. They drive me crazy regardless of whether the chickita wearing them is hot or not.
3. You know those drying machines in public toilets that have a roll of cloth and you're supposed to pull them, dry your hand and then leave them to be automatically rolled back in? I'm positive there is something sinister about them, don't know what it is, but I assure you I'm onto them.
4. I have an evil uberPod that regularly taunts me by its sarcastic music choice.
5. I FIFO everything in my kitchen: water bottles, fruits, yogurt...etc anything has to be consumed in the order it was purchased.
6. I have a tendency to 'fight the system' when I'm treated unfairly. I do that even if I don't have the slightest chance to win, it's not wining that matters to me, it's causing the most harm as I go down that does. Some say I'm stubborn others say I'm plain stupid. I like to think I'm a pain in the ass if treated unfairly.
7. I worship the number 7 and 2007 was MY YEAR.
8. I once peed on someone, and no she wasn't bitten by a jelly fish.
9. I consider Mojito a gay drink.
10. I have watched every episode of Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama and South Park at least twice.
Next I tag Dipty and Eureka.
1. I don't appreciate hand-shaking for the sake of hand-shaking. If we are friends and I saw you yesterday, I wouldn't want to shake your hand when I meet you today. The concept of hand-shaking should be restricted to formal introductions. Oh and to top it off, I'm highly untouchy-unfeely.
2. I have the weirdest turn-on: dark pants that have thin white stripes. They drive me crazy regardless of whether the chickita wearing them is hot or not.
3. You know those drying machines in public toilets that have a roll of cloth and you're supposed to pull them, dry your hand and then leave them to be automatically rolled back in? I'm positive there is something sinister about them, don't know what it is, but I assure you I'm onto them.
4. I have an evil uberPod that regularly taunts me by its sarcastic music choice.
5. I FIFO everything in my kitchen: water bottles, fruits, yogurt...etc anything has to be consumed in the order it was purchased.
6. I have a tendency to 'fight the system' when I'm treated unfairly. I do that even if I don't have the slightest chance to win, it's not wining that matters to me, it's causing the most harm as I go down that does. Some say I'm stubborn others say I'm plain stupid. I like to think I'm a pain in the ass if treated unfairly.
7. I worship the number 7 and 2007 was MY YEAR.
8. I once peed on someone, and no she wasn't bitten by a jelly fish.
9. I consider Mojito a gay drink.
10. I have watched every episode of Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama and South Park at least twice.
Next I tag Dipty and Eureka.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Monday, March 17, 2008
In the Year 2525..
...If man is still alive, If woman can survive, They may find...". Did you know that this song by Zager and Evans was on top of the charts when Neil Armstrong was landing on the moon in 1969? Very interesting. Anyhoo, I don't know why this song jumped to my head when I first got this event invite on Facebook the other day.
Before I tell you about this invite, let me take a step back and tell you about the Frozen Wastelanders obsessive-compulsive need to plan everything well in advance. It's really extreme here, I'm talking "booking-your-wedding-date-and-time-2-years-in-advance" weird. I can definitely see the upside of extreme planning. Your week becomes very organized since you know when you're going out and with whom. Personally, I have been managing projects for the last 5 years and I managed to keep the majority on track over the course of months and sometimes years thanks to planning. But I chose to do less planning when it comes to trivial things in life like going out for a movie or a house party. A life that is planned 5 days in advance is one too boring for me, I prefer more spontaneous people and plans.
But of course you can't be spontaneous on your own here in the Wastelands, believe me, I tried. First few weeks here, I called people up on Saturday evening to check out what we'll be doing. Nothing. People were already booked for extremely simple things for the next few days if not a week or so in advance! So I learned that in order to get on people's calendars for a movie night, I probably need to contact them a week in advance. You live and learn.
Which takes me to the Facebook invite I mentioned earlier. I got used to getting invites for house parties 1-2 or even 3 weeks in advance, which is okay. So the other day I get an invite 2 months and half in advance. Yes an invite that is 10 weeks in advance. An invite that gives you 20% of the year as a notice. And no, it's not an invite for a wedding in Hawaii, where the lead time would be needed to try and fish for a bargain ticket, it's an invite for a birthday party on a Saturday afternoon at a dude's place? I didn't know how to process it. I couldn't accept or decline it, unlike everyone else I don't know what I'll be doing for the next 10 Saturday nights.
I know, I'm pathetic, don't look at me.
Before I tell you about this invite, let me take a step back and tell you about the Frozen Wastelanders obsessive-compulsive need to plan everything well in advance. It's really extreme here, I'm talking "booking-your-wedding-date-and-time-2-years-in-advance" weird. I can definitely see the upside of extreme planning. Your week becomes very organized since you know when you're going out and with whom. Personally, I have been managing projects for the last 5 years and I managed to keep the majority on track over the course of months and sometimes years thanks to planning. But I chose to do less planning when it comes to trivial things in life like going out for a movie or a house party. A life that is planned 5 days in advance is one too boring for me, I prefer more spontaneous people and plans.
But of course you can't be spontaneous on your own here in the Wastelands, believe me, I tried. First few weeks here, I called people up on Saturday evening to check out what we'll be doing. Nothing. People were already booked for extremely simple things for the next few days if not a week or so in advance! So I learned that in order to get on people's calendars for a movie night, I probably need to contact them a week in advance. You live and learn.
Which takes me to the Facebook invite I mentioned earlier. I got used to getting invites for house parties 1-2 or even 3 weeks in advance, which is okay. So the other day I get an invite 2 months and half in advance. Yes an invite that is 10 weeks in advance. An invite that gives you 20% of the year as a notice. And no, it's not an invite for a wedding in Hawaii, where the lead time would be needed to try and fish for a bargain ticket, it's an invite for a birthday party on a Saturday afternoon at a dude's place? I didn't know how to process it. I couldn't accept or decline it, unlike everyone else I don't know what I'll be doing for the next 10 Saturday nights.
I know, I'm pathetic, don't look at me.
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Salam, Brother..
I despise trend-whores. You know the ones who'll jump on anything new and pick it up whether it suites them or not? In the two years I've spent here in the Frozen Wastelands I've noticed that as a percentage of the total population, the trend-whores are a very big chunk. Actually they are such a big group that there's a slang term to describe them. It's choco. Unfortunately, turns out it's not a derogatory term like I hoped, but rather meaning how hip and kwel you are. Ugh.
One of the more interesting trends that caught on here is wearing a keffiyeh (in Egyptian-Arabic it's more of a koffieyh, but I went with how WikiGod has spelled it). And not any keffiyeh, the trademark checkered one. It's interesting because in the last 40+ years the checkered keffiyeh was made famous by the late Palestinian leader Arafat and became a worldwide symbol of the Palestinian cause. More recently with the Intifadas the keffiyehs made their way to universities worldwide and came to represent a political statement: solidarity with the Palestinian cause. It's very sad to see such a powerful symbol turned into a kwel trend and none of the trend-whores prancing around wrapped in it understand its real meaning.
But on a more practical note, tell if I could pull this off. I let my beard go, put on my keffiyeh and my kaki pants and a black shirt. I also stuff my alarm clock (which has this big digital red display) into my backpack and put it on countdown mode. Then, I roam the streets here till I find one of them trend-whores, I approach him and speak in a very broken English, with a heavy Arabic accent:
Brother Fesh: Brother, Salam... I see you are one of us?
*point to his keffiyeh
Wastelander Brother: Przepraszam? (Frozen Wastelandees for 'Excuse me?')
*hold his keffiyeh and mine and explain
Brother Fesh: We, together...BOOM! BOOM! *throw my hands in the air..
If he still didn't pee his pants or run away, I'll open my backpack very slowly and give him a peek at the bold red digits slowly counting down.
One of the more interesting trends that caught on here is wearing a keffiyeh (in Egyptian-Arabic it's more of a koffieyh, but I went with how WikiGod has spelled it). And not any keffiyeh, the trademark checkered one. It's interesting because in the last 40+ years the checkered keffiyeh was made famous by the late Palestinian leader Arafat and became a worldwide symbol of the Palestinian cause. More recently with the Intifadas the keffiyehs made their way to universities worldwide and came to represent a political statement: solidarity with the Palestinian cause. It's very sad to see such a powerful symbol turned into a kwel trend and none of the trend-whores prancing around wrapped in it understand its real meaning.
But on a more practical note, tell if I could pull this off. I let my beard go, put on my keffiyeh and my kaki pants and a black shirt. I also stuff my alarm clock (which has this big digital red display) into my backpack and put it on countdown mode. Then, I roam the streets here till I find one of them trend-whores, I approach him and speak in a very broken English, with a heavy Arabic accent:
Brother Fesh: Brother, Salam... I see you are one of us?
*point to his keffiyeh
Wastelander Brother: Przepraszam? (Frozen Wastelandees for 'Excuse me?')
*hold his keffiyeh and mine and explain
Brother Fesh: We, together...BOOM! BOOM! *throw my hands in the air..
If he still didn't pee his pants or run away, I'll open my backpack very slowly and give him a peek at the bold red digits slowly counting down.
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Monday, February 25, 2008
Gifts
I hate gifts, they hate me back and we have this thriving mutual disrespect. I overthink gifts, I keep thinking about the pros and cons of every gift idea and at the end I can't decide which is really the best one. This issue only happens when I'm giving gifts, with me I know exactly what I need *Fesh pets his uberPod*.
So, back in December we were having this traditional Frozen Wastelandees Christmas dinner at work. As the Wastelanders enjoyed their cold fish, coated with gelatin and smothered with pig fat, I imagined myself at my happy place (Burger King) and tried to kill time by trying to guess the gender of the person from the present they got. We were doing this secret Santa thing where each person gets a gift and then we redistribute them randomly. Here are my observations:
So, back in December we were having this traditional Frozen Wastelandees Christmas dinner at work. As the Wastelanders enjoyed their cold fish, coated with gelatin and smothered with pig fat, I imagined myself at my happy place (Burger King) and tried to kill time by trying to guess the gender of the person from the present they got. We were doing this secret Santa thing where each person gets a gift and then we redistribute them randomly. Here are my observations:
- Two small Christmas tree decorations put in a small paper bag. => Guy present.
- A Festive paperbag with a mug (which in turn was wrapped in a different gift wrapping) inside and then inside the mug a little plastic bag with 3 small Christmas tree decorations. Oh and the dead giveaway: the paperbag was sellotaped-shut. => Girl present.
- 50ml bottle of vodka not wrapped in anything. => Guy present.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Random Conversations #59123
I got inspired by Eureka to post some of the weird conversations I have with my friends. I decided to post this one, which happened on the Walls of Facebook:
Fesh: HEY! I demand some lovin'. Leaving a bruder freezing like that in the Frozen Wastelands with no lovin'... SHAME...SHAME!
Beco: *Beco stands next Fesh looking down like emperor penguins
Fesh: *Fesh lays an egg.
Beco: KHEYAAAAAAAANAH!
Beco: hey did you ever wonder how birds do it? I mean with dogs its doggie style.. what about birds?!?! Birddie style?! and how does that look? Not a right conversation to have on a wall ey?
Fesh: No no.. it's the perfect conversation to have... so in my mind the Birddie-style entails the use of the wings... so they are hovering in the air and the wing flapping is moderating... you know...*ahm*.. the rhythm?
Beco: hmmm.. interesting look on things.. have you noticed that everything is kinda doggie style?!? cats - dogs - cows - deer.. why was it attributed to the dog?!?
Fesh: pffffff... pls.. that is so simple... why do we call things Feshfeshy though they might be Fesh-related or not? It's the same reason really... think about it...
Beco: touche.. I am not worthy to be in the path of your infinite wisdom! Thank you sense
......but if you really think about it.. anything called Feshfeshy, usually is fesh related.. puny, hairy & questionable!!
Fesh: ...and the student becomes the master. You are ready.
Fesh: HEY! I demand some lovin'. Leaving a bruder freezing like that in the Frozen Wastelands with no lovin'... SHAME...SHAME!
Beco: *Beco stands next Fesh looking down like emperor penguins
Fesh: *Fesh lays an egg.
Beco: KHEYAAAAAAAANAH!
Beco: hey did you ever wonder how birds do it? I mean with dogs its doggie style.. what about birds?!?! Birddie style?! and how does that look? Not a right conversation to have on a wall ey?
Fesh: No no.. it's the perfect conversation to have... so in my mind the Birddie-style entails the use of the wings... so they are hovering in the air and the wing flapping is moderating... you know...*ahm*.. the rhythm?
Beco: hmmm.. interesting look on things.. have you noticed that everything is kinda doggie style?!? cats - dogs - cows - deer.. why was it attributed to the dog?!?
Fesh: pffffff... pls.. that is so simple... why do we call things Feshfeshy though they might be Fesh-related or not? It's the same reason really... think about it...
Beco: touche.. I am not worthy to be in the path of your infinite wisdom! Thank you sense
......but if you really think about it.. anything called Feshfeshy, usually is fesh related.. puny, hairy & questionable!!
Fesh: ...and the student becomes the master. You are ready.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Bloggers Anonymous
I don't get it. Why does everything have to be so anonymous on the Blogosphere? Most bloggers refrain from using their real names or real nicknames. Some bloggers even live their alter ego online. Why is that? Why is it that the bloggers 'real' friends are always reduced to capital letters like 'K' or 'H' or 'M'? or fake descriptive nicknames like 'AngelEyes'?
One explanation is that the blogger is considerate of the privacy of their friends and don't want to mention their real names/nicknames. But, when you tell such a story in real life, you either don't mention your friends (if their role is not important) or you mention them because it's important to the story. I never recall having heard a story from a person, even if I JUST met and I know nothing about him, that went: So I was with my friend, let's call her "B". Right? So why is it that when this same story is being told to the same random people but now on the Blogosphere suddenly it has to be riddled with Capital Letter People?
You can argue that, unlike a story to a random person over a drink in a bar, the story 'sticks' on the Blogosphere. That is, it will be there for years to come documented and neatly indexed by Google (all hail our Overlord). Which is true, but then again, why doesn't the blogger opt for not mentioning who exactly from thier friends, I don't see how knowing that this friend can be refereed to as "K" adds to the plot line? Do you think it's just to feel that they are still in control? An internal power struggle in the blogger's head since they are exposing SO much on thier blog that they want to feel they are still in control and holding back on something? Like their real names or their friends'?
One explanation is that the blogger is considerate of the privacy of their friends and don't want to mention their real names/nicknames. But, when you tell such a story in real life, you either don't mention your friends (if their role is not important) or you mention them because it's important to the story. I never recall having heard a story from a person, even if I JUST met and I know nothing about him, that went: So I was with my friend, let's call her "B". Right? So why is it that when this same story is being told to the same random people but now on the Blogosphere suddenly it has to be riddled with Capital Letter People?
You can argue that, unlike a story to a random person over a drink in a bar, the story 'sticks' on the Blogosphere. That is, it will be there for years to come documented and neatly indexed by Google (all hail our Overlord). Which is true, but then again, why doesn't the blogger opt for not mentioning who exactly from thier friends, I don't see how knowing that this friend can be refereed to as "K" adds to the plot line? Do you think it's just to feel that they are still in control? An internal power struggle in the blogger's head since they are exposing SO much on thier blog that they want to feel they are still in control and holding back on something? Like their real names or their friends'?
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Monday, February 11, 2008
Vote For Your Favorite City!
Came across this today, Monopoly is asking people to vote for their favorite cities to include them in the next release of Monopoly. So kool! Vote!
Saturday, February 09, 2008
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Black Fesh 6.0
When Fesh left the creepy old man's dungeon, he wasn't smiling. There was no familiar smoke figure above the chimney either. The old man leveled with Fesh, the Ivorians have reached him before Fesh did. When Fesh offered to double or triple whatever the Ivorians were paying, the old man explained that it was too late. Fesh understood when he saw on the old man's desk the familiar figure:
There is no way they can overcome the spell cast against them now. It's almost impossible.... yet miracles happen.
There is no way they can overcome the spell cast against them now. It's almost impossible.... yet miracles happen.
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
Olympic Fesh
When Wikilink makes it to the Olympics, I'm going to be Egypt's (and probably the world's) first nerd-turned-Olympian. I might not be the fastest on the pitch or the best with those freakishly fast tennis/ squash/ basketball/ volleyball balls, but damn it I have the excellent motor skills for Wikilink. I have trained all my life for this! As soon as the race starts I become one with the keyboard, the mouse and the scroller wheels and I fall into the reality of ht Wiki, a reality I like and feel comfortable in. It's true that I might not know all the ways of the Wiki that Master Munqy do. But I will learn.. and mark my words, when that day comes I'll be right there on the podium.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Black Fesh 5.0
So are you sure this time? Asked the the creepy old man as he added the dented golden hoof to the mix. Oh, yes, I'm sorry about last time. I must have confused you. Explained Fesh. Confused me?! Repeated the old man. Your weak soul is not capable of this. NOW... take this and microwave it just before the game starts. Should do the effect.
Fesh put the stinky package into this microwave, turned the knob to high and set the timer for 5 mins, as the old man recommended. At around 4 mins and 37 seconds the cover popped open and the gooey matter stained the glass with this pattern:
(oh, I forgot to ask the old man for a spell for Cameroon, but I'm confident Tunisia will send the Lions home tonight)
Fesh put the stinky package into this microwave, turned the knob to high and set the timer for 5 mins, as the old man recommended. At around 4 mins and 37 seconds the cover popped open and the gooey matter stained the glass with this pattern:
(oh, I forgot to ask the old man for a spell for Cameroon, but I'm confident Tunisia will send the Lions home tonight)
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Black Fesh 4.0
The creepy old man went into his small room and closed the door behind him. As he turned on the lights a cold voice came from behind him: I've been expecting you. The old man turned sharply to find Fesh sitting on his desk petting a white chihuahua. A pale smile came across the old man's face as he approached Fesh: Look, regarding the last spell, after you left Jade showed up and she.. Fesh interrupted: The sick sick things you do for Jade do not interest me... and I haven't come here for an explanation. Then why did you come here? Your game is tomorrow? Fesh threw the chihuahua away and walked towards him saying: Our game we'll talk tomorrow. Now, I have put a lot of money on today's games. I want to be sure there will be no surprises.
After Fesh left, the old man opened the the envelop he left for him. Inside were two small postcards. It is going to be an easy spell, thought the old man.
After Fesh left, the old man opened the the envelop he left for him. Inside were two small postcards. It is going to be an easy spell, thought the old man.
 |  |
Friday, February 01, 2008
The Fesh Factor: Jan 08
I give you The Fesh Factor article for January 2008. Proudly sponsored by Twinings Green Tea.
(you can enlarge the picture by clicking on it and it opens up in full screen)
..and the actual article:
Hail me, for EyE R STILL DAS UBER Published Fesh.
(you can enlarge the picture by clicking on it and it opens up in full screen)
..and the actual article:
Hail me, for EyE R STILL DAS UBER Published Fesh.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Black Fesh 3.0
Fesh watched as the creepy old man mixed a combination of black beetle concentrate, green monkey testicles, golden scorpion legs and dried-up red rat eyes. A small hunchback figure emerged from the corner of the dark room, with the last ingredient: a bold eagle's unhatched egg. Fesh, now a regular client of the old man, knew that he doesn’t like to be disturbed as he works. So Fesh left the payment on the desk and quickly left the underground dungeon. As Fesh walked away he suddenly realized that if they win today they’ll qualify as first of the group and thus meet Ivory Coast in the semifinals! A highly unfavorable situation especially considering Ivory Coast's performance this tournament! But if they lose today, they would qualify as second of the group and they’ll –probably- have a much easier team in the semifinals! In a way, by losing today they might book their ticket to the finals! Fesh realizing the huge mistake he has done quickly turns back, only to find that it was too late. A familiar smoke figure hung above the old man’s chimney:
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
My Evil uberPod
I've always believed that my uberPod has an evil sense of humor, maybe it's the way it silently mocked me when I wasn't looking. Maybe it's my ever-growing inferiority complex. But yesterday I think I got the hard evidence I was looking for. Here's the story:
I arrived at elCairo's International Airport at 2am and for the next 6+ hours, as I journyed via Budapest to the Frozen Wastelands, I would be listening to my uberPod's exquisite selection of songs. I have kept it on 'shuffle' for all those 6 hours and exactly 2 minutes before landing at the Frozen Wastelands Madona's 'Frozen' starts playing! I looked at its screen in disbelif thinking only one thing: touché.
I arrived at elCairo's International Airport at 2am and for the next 6+ hours, as I journyed via Budapest to the Frozen Wastelands, I would be listening to my uberPod's exquisite selection of songs. I have kept it on 'shuffle' for all those 6 hours and exactly 2 minutes before landing at the Frozen Wastelands Madona's 'Frozen' starts playing! I looked at its screen in disbelif thinking only one thing: touché.
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Frozen Wastelands, Here I Come!
Yup, my days in sunny elCairo passed like a blink of an eye! I'm feeling lucky about my luggage this time. I feel it's going to arrive safely at the belt there. I guess we'll see! :)
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Black Fesh 2.0
The return to the underground dungeon where the old creepy man lived was not easy. Fesh knew he needed the old man's services once more. Fesh reviewed what he'd say to the creepy old man word-by-word as he went down the stairs. The old man looked up, his face pleasantly surprised: So although they are no match for you, you still come to me? Fesh quickly sat down and recited the answer he has been practicing all the way: I haven't come here to ask you for a spell to win. I have come to ask you for a spell to humiliate them, they need to lose so bad they'll regret sharing a border with us for the rest of their lives! ....Fesh hesitated for a second and added: I'm talking of a 5 goal difference win. Can you help me?
The old man nodded and got to work mixing a red liquid with a black one in a pot over the the fire. Fesh not sure if he should leave now or not hesitated and quietly stood up. The old man quickly looked in his direction and barked: BEGONE! As Fesh stumbled across the room he saw, with the corner of his eye, the old man pulling something out of a jar labeled: Green Monkey Testicles and throwing it in the mix.
Fesh breathed deeply as he stepped outside, trying to clear his lungs of the dungeon's stink. Looking up, he could see the creepy old man's chimney and above it hung an eerie smoke figure:
Fesh smiled, assured that They are under the old man's spell now.
The old man nodded and got to work mixing a red liquid with a black one in a pot over the the fire. Fesh not sure if he should leave now or not hesitated and quietly stood up. The old man quickly looked in his direction and barked: BEGONE! As Fesh stumbled across the room he saw, with the corner of his eye, the old man pulling something out of a jar labeled: Green Monkey Testicles and throwing it in the mix.
Fesh breathed deeply as he stepped outside, trying to clear his lungs of the dungeon's stink. Looking up, he could see the creepy old man's chimney and above it hung an eerie smoke figure:
Fesh smiled, assured that They are under the old man's spell now.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Can't Help it...
Me: is it too soon to take a shot at this Frozen Wastelandese military aircraft that crashed after the officers on board just completed a conference on flight safety?
ViH: you're a sick sick freak... people died!
Me: I know, I know.. I'm sorry, maybe in a couple of month? Like a joke with the 'flight safety conference' bit as the punch-line?
ViH: you disgust me.
Me: okay, OKAY... fine.. I'll shut up.
ViH: you're a sick sick freak... people died!
Me: I know, I know.. I'm sorry, maybe in a couple of month? Like a joke with the 'flight safety conference' bit as the punch-line?
ViH: you disgust me.
Me: okay, OKAY... fine.. I'll shut up.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Black Fesh
The creepy old man removed a drowsy bat from a jar and slit its throat; its highly viscous greenish blood oozed out on the table. Fesh flinched at the disgusting sight and didn't notice as the old man threw in some red dried-up rat eyes and some golden scorpion legs. The mix, now stirred by the old man, strangely looked like this:
The old man looked up and whispered in a frail voice: Fear not, they are under my spell. Fesh hesitated as he drew out a small sack from his pocket and asked: Are you...uhm..sure? The old man banged his hand on the table with one quick move that seemed to be at odds with his worn-out looks and yield: DON'T EVER QUESTION ME! Almost falling over from his chair, Fesh quickly got on his feet and handed the old man the sack. As Fesh left the underground dungeon he had a grin on his face, quickly looking at his watch he knew it was only 30 mins away.
The old man looked up and whispered in a frail voice: Fear not, they are under my spell. Fesh hesitated as he drew out a small sack from his pocket and asked: Are you...uhm..sure? The old man banged his hand on the table with one quick move that seemed to be at odds with his worn-out looks and yield: DON'T EVER QUESTION ME! Almost falling over from his chair, Fesh quickly got on his feet and handed the old man the sack. As Fesh left the underground dungeon he had a grin on his face, quickly looking at his watch he knew it was only 30 mins away.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)