*Fesh pets his überPod.
Have you noticed how over the last few years Apple Fundamentalism has been on the rise? Former PCians are being converted en masse by fundamentalists who preach how their new Apple computer "changed their life". I came across one of the pamphlets those hard-line Applians use to recruit lost souls. The pamphlet highlights the five pillars of The Applian Doctrine:
1. God intended everything to be Apple, some lost their way.
2. Apple's OS has been coded by God. Line-by-line that is. So it's immaculate and error-free. It's blasphemous to claim otherwise.
3. God will smite any virus or worm if it attempts to infect an Apple machine.
4. You don't need to know why you want an Apple machine. You have to trust that it's the right thing for you. (a.k.a. the "La Tonakiesh Wala Togadel Ya Akh Ali" argument).
5. If you accept the Applian Doctrine, you need to convert 5 of your friends or God will turn you into a mouse. A two-button PC mouse, not one of those sexy Apple ones. Your choice.
So, even if you're a follower of The Enlightened One and hate The Great Satan, you have to admit that this is überkool.
Wow, talk about a desperate PR stunt...
ReplyDeleteBlessed be the White Fruit
For it fills our eyes with the light of righteousness
Honour thy Puma, Jaguar, Panther, Tiger and Leopard
But forget not the light grey and rainbow fruit of yesteryear
If thou siteth an M$ user
Whose corruption is such that there is no hope for salvation
The heretic shalt be locked in a darkened room with nought for company but the endless loops of speeches by The Enlightened One until his soul is saved or taken by The Great Satan.
For meditation this evening, we shall watch the Apple ads that poke fun at M$:
http://www.apple.com/getamac/ads/
*Fesh, lured by Munqy's prayer and soothing voice, sits in the circle to be brainwashed...
ReplyDeleteVista kicks ass!!!!
ReplyDeleteExcept when it tells me "You cant perform this operation, contact your administrator"
I AM THE ADMINISTRATOR FUCKERS!!!
See, these are the security features that make Vista one of the most robust operating systems out th.. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry, I couldn't say this with a straight face. Thing about Vista is that it came out SO late (what 7 years after XP?) that people where expecting that it brings a lot of things, which it didn't.
Actually, had Vista arrived like 2 years after XP (like what Apple does with frequent OS releases) it would have been much more appreciated.
And Jade, you're not an Admin on your PC ...hehehehehe hahahahahaha
you PC mocks you...
*Jade breaks down into tears
ReplyDeleteBut I thought my PC was my best friend, snif snif, it plays with me on lonely nights, it gives me porn, loads of it!
Dont say that about it!
IT'S NOT FAIR!!!
There.. there...
ReplyDeletePlus who needs PC porn when you can have Internet porn? It's endless man... ENDLESS I TELL YA!
*Jade wipes her boogers
ReplyDeleteWhat? What do you mean? Isnt PC & Internet the same thing?
Such a n00b mistake. PC Porn is kool man, but you get bored out of it quickly.
ReplyDeleteThen you start trolling online... sure at first the prospect of a donkey and an 80-year old sounds 'odd'... But two weeks later you cant get enough of it... and you want more.. MORE.
Then you come across Two Girls and a Cup. Sure, you're traumatized at first and swear you'll never troll again for Internet pron.... 3 days later and the Two Girls video is on repeat as you jack-off to it....
....errr... too much sharing, huh?
No man... no not at all.
ReplyDeleteWell - that's what I use my PC for too.
*Jade holds up the black walky talky to her mouth (wearing a black fingerless glove)
"He's Ready"
*6 Men in white coats charge towards Fesh
...
*Fesh, nekked and covered in grease, starts to run away...
ReplyDeleteYou will never catch me!
It's pretty sad M$ has to resort to that to convince people they have something worth their attention, machine upgrade, money..
ReplyDeleteAnd if you don't know how to disable the UAC, you're pretty much gonna be spending your days banging your head against a wall..
Tut tut, saye3 fe el 3ahera we mish fadee to update us?
ReplyDeleteDamn you! Catching me like that when I'm connection-less in Alex!
ReplyDeletePlus, you know the updates man... weekend at the Maison de Munqy was DA BOMB. Black Vodka delivered on it's promise. Feedz -The Beer Tank- delivered on his promise. Aku.... err.. delivered on his promise?
ooohhh... that's mean!!! but then, you're the one to tell us if Aku delivered on his promise to you, old Feshfeshy!
ReplyDeleteby the way, you still have black poison left?
The Black Poison lives....
ReplyDeleteyay! save some for me :)
ReplyDeleteKudos to ya people!
ReplyDeleteThis is seriously hillarious
Thanks man! Glad you liked it! :)
ReplyDelete